A SIMPLE GUIDE TO SELF-REGULATION

A simple guide to Self-regulation and the science behind why each step actually works.

A gentle guide for the moments you feel yourself slipping out of your body and into survival mode. Self-regulation isn't about being calm all the time. It's about knowing how to bring yourself back when your nervous system starts to spiral. Here are simple, real-life ways to practice it - the ones that actually make a difference.

1. Name what's happening in your body. Not the story. Not the fear. Just the sensation. "My chest is tight." "My heart is racing." "My stomach feels heavy."

Why this works: This interrupts the emotional spiral and signals safety to the brain. It grounds you in the present moment and interrupts the emotional story your brain is spinning. 2. Slow your exhale. Not your inhale - your exhale. Do this: Breathe in for 4 Exhale for 6 Repeat 3-5 times Why this works: A longer exhale activates the vagus nerve and signals your nervous system to shift out of fight-or-flight. It tells your stystem, "We're safe. We don't need to fight or run." You'll feel your whole body soften. 3. Ground your senses (5-4-3-2-1). Look around and name: 5 things you can see 4 things you can touch 3 things you can hear 2 things you can smell 1 thing you can taste

Why this works: Overwhelm lives in the mind. Your senses live in the present. When you connect with what you can see, hear, touch, smell, or taste, your brain cannot stay in panic mode at the same time. Your body recognises: "I am here. I am safe." 4. Put a hand on your chest or stomach. One hand on your chest One hand on your belly Slow breath out Why this works: Soothing touch releases oxytocin, the safety and bonding hormone. Even when you give the touch to yourself, your nervous system responds as if someone is comforting you. Instant grounding. 5. Gentle self-talk. Your inner child is always listening. Try phrases like: "Slow down, sweetheart. You're okay." "You don't have to react right now." "We'll get through this together." Why this works: Your nervous system reacts more to tone than to words. A calm, soft inner voice lowers perceived danger and helps interrupt spiralling thoughts. 6. Move the energy through your body. If you're overwhelmed, your body is trying to discharge stress. Do this: Shake your hands. Roll your shoulders. Go for a short walk. Stretch your spine. Do a deep yawn or sigh. Why this works: Stress creates physical activation. If you don't release it, your body stays stuck in a heightened state. Movement completes the stress cycle and helps your system reset. Your body knows what to do - you're just giving it permission. 7. One tiny grounded action. This gives your brain a sense of control again, which reduces overwhelm. Do this: Sip water. Open a window. Wash your hands. Sit on the floor. Step outside for fresh air. Why it works: Overwhelm often comes from feeling powerless. One small action restores a sense of control and stability, which calms the nervous system immediately. Small actions, big regulation. The truth is... Self-regulation is a learned skill, not a personality trait. You are not "too emotional," "too reactive," or "too sensitive." Your nervous system is doing the best it can with what it has known. Every time you pause... Every time you breathe... Every time you choose a gentler response... You are rewiring your entire inner world. That is healing. That is self-trust. That is you rising. 🩷